To better understand why some women choose to have a lover, a study conducted by the dating platform Gleeden surveyed 11,000 married women and revealed several common reasons behind female infidelity. One of the most notable findings was that seven out of ten women admitted they prefer a younger lover, ideally around the age of 34.

For many of these women, being with someone younger made them feel more attractive, vibrant, and alive. They explained that younger men tended to show more interest in their daily lives, careers, and emotions, which stood in sharp contrast to the emotional detachment they often experienced with men their own age. The emotional void they felt in their current relationships pushed them to seek validation and appreciation elsewhere, especially from someone who made them feel seen and valued. One of the key reasons mentioned for stepping outside the marriage was a lack of communication.

Many of these women reported that they and their husbands spoke for less than thirty minutes a day, and when they did, the conversations were often shallow or strictly practical. Over time, this communication breakdown created emotional distance. Without meaningful conversations, they started to feel invisible and emotionally isolated, eventually turning to someone who would truly listen. Another factor was the absence of thoughtful gestures and affection.

A significant number of women said they no longer felt loved or appreciated by their spouses. They missed the little things—the unexpected compliment, the warm hug, or a simple “thank you.” When those gestures disappeared, so did their sense of emotional connection. That longing for affection drove them toward someone who could give them the attention they craved. Lack of empathy also played a role. Many participants in the study expressed frustration that their husbands didn’t understand their emotional needs or struggles. They felt their partners lacked the ability to put themselves in their shoes, leaving them feeling misunderstood and emotionally neglected. In contrast, their lovers were often described as more emotionally attuned, offering the understanding they missed at home. In some cases, the decision to have a lover was driven by revenge.

Some women had discovered that their husbands had been unfaithful, but rather than leaving the relationship, they decided to even the score. Their infidelity wasn’t about falling out of love—it was about reclaiming power in a situation where they had felt powerless. These women didn’t necessarily want to destroy their marriages; instead, they wanted to balance the emotional scale. Physical dissatisfaction was another motivator. Some women reported that while they still loved their husbands, their intimate lives had become unfulfilling. Whether due to a lack of desire, routine, or unresolved tension, the spark was gone. Rather than confronting the issue head-on, they quietly sought satisfaction elsewhere while continuing to maintain a stable home life. They justified their actions as a necessary secret to preserve the overall harmony of the marriage. Perhaps one of the most common explanations for infidelity among married women was the feeling of not being loved. They spoke about how the absence of affectionate gestures and meaningful compliments made them feel invisible. It wasn’t that their husbands didn’t care—it was that the way they expressed love had faded or disappeared entirely. These women wanted to feel special again, and when someone new came along and gave them the attention they were missing, the emotional connection was hard to resist. Ultimately, the study highlighted that infidelity among women isn’t always about falling out of love with their husbands. In many cases, they still cared deeply for their spouses but felt neglected, misunderstood, or emotionally unfulfilled. Their decisions were often driven by a desire to feel valued, understood, and alive again. These choices may not be easy to understand from the outside, but for many women, they represented a way to cope with unmet emotional needs without necessarily ending their marriages.